dimanche 1 juin 2014

T minus 30 days

Can you guess what this post is going to be about?

Yes, I am moving.

Can you guess where? I'll give you a hint.

Author of photo: Den Nation.








Do you remember these guys?

That's right, I'm moving to none other than...

Author of photo: Den Nation.
Denmark!

That's right, we're going back. In exactly one month. Well, actually now it's less than a month since it's already the early hours of June 2nd and we're leaving on the 30th.

But...

Yes, there is a but.

This is a move that I am not entirely on board with. I have discussed this with my husband and he understands my feelings. That is not to say that I don't want to go because I definitely do want to go. There is so much that I have yet to explore up north like Latvia, Norway and Russia, places which are difficult to get to from Bordeaux, and I actually like learning Danish and living in Copenhagen. However, I don't really want to leave Bordeaux. The more I think about it, the more I feel that living in Bordeaux suits me. The thing is, though, I have already talked about this and you all know that I have just been floating along in Bordeaux (as a lot of you living in France are doing as well, so I'm not special in this regard) and in Copenhagen I felt alive it that explains anything. But... I really do love living here: the wine, the countryside, the city, the food, the weather, my friends here, my apartment, cycling everywhere, etc, etc. I don't feel some external force pulling me to leave Bordeaux.

Luckily, my husband is keeping his job here. That's the good thing about being a fonctionnaire in France - you can put your job 'on hold'. So we are going off to Denmark for 2 years, but we have the option of coming back after one year and we can even stay in Denmark for up to 5 years. After 5 years we must come back here if my husband wishes to keep his job. Honestly, though, things could go either way - we could really miss it here and want to come back at all costs or we could like Denmark so much that we wouldn't want to come back here. The thing is, working in France at the university involves dealing with a lot of paperwork and unproductive meetings. My husband is a scientist and wants to mainly focus on his work and he thinks that Denmark can offer him that. It is true, the position in Denmark is a promotion for him - he'll be at a higher grade, be paid more (even with the higher cost of living in Denmark, he'll still be earning more than in France) and have almost half of the teaching hours that he has in Bordeaux.

Yes, I said that I like learning Danish and living in Copenhagen. But do I really want to focus my attention on learning Danish? Maybe I just want to continue improving my French instead of continuing with Danish. After all, I know that it would take me years to get my Danish up to the same level as my French or Italian. Do I really want to put in all that effort?

And sure, Copenhagen is a nice city and things are easy there and relaxed. But I do like living in France, as unorganized and stressful as it may be at times. 

Anyway... there's more...

A few days after we went to Denmark and my husband signed his work contract back in March, I received a call that I have been waiting years for. For the past few years I have been applying for a job (the same job) and have been rejected twice. This year I almost didn't apply (you can only apply once a year) since I was going to Denmark, but decided to apply anyway just in case. Well, of course the just in case happened this year. I still don't have the job and won't know until September if I have the job or not, but in March I went through the police check which involved going down to the police station for an interview. The other years I was never called for the interview. Of course this doesn't mean anything as they could be conducting police checks on a bunch of applicants and then pick from the lot, but something tells me that come September it is going to be a yes. Just because I am supposed to leave.

The job would involve me being physically here some of the time. I wouldn't be an employee - I would be an on-call freelancer. What I need to do is to get in touch with other people who already have this job and ask them how often they get called and at what notice. I think that commuting from Denmark would be crazy, but if it were only every now and again I could handle it. However, working under this status would make me more attractive as a freelancer in France and I could more easily find more freelancing jobs with other companies or organizations. But not if I'm in Denmark - I would physically need to be present in France for this kind of work even if I am working from home. This would be a huge opportunity for me here - if I was hired I'm pretty sure that I could finally have the career that I've always wanted.

So what should I do? Nothing for the moment of course as they have not said yes. I am relying on the slowness of everything here to work in my favour. If I do get a yes, let's just hope that I can stretch out the process as long as possible and buy myself some time.

I don't want to become a weekend couple. With this kind of distance, though, I couldn't even be a weekend couple actually. My husband has a lot of flexibility with his work and I could be flexible as well with this job, but I really don't see myself going back and forth. I would hate that, I am sure of it. I am happiest with my husband at my side. But I have felt like a failure in France professionally for far too long to let this opportunity pass.

I am going to Canada this summer. I'm going to enjoy my summer with my family and friends and try not to think about the job. For now I am moving to Denmark and if I get a positive response, I'll have to re-examine my options at that time. This is not the explanation for the doubts that I raised above, however, as I had doubts about moving back to Denmark even before the possibility of this job came up.

So, will it be Bordeaux?

La Grosse Cloche gate in Bordeaux. Author of photo: Den Nation.





Or Copenhagen?

Rosenborg Castle in Copenhagen. Author of photo: Den Nation.


Only time will tell...

18 commentaires:

  1. Oh, wow, so many decisions to make! I hear you, tough ones too. In a good way, because these are exciting perspectives. I'll be absolutely no help though, I suck at making decisions :lol: I'm not into Northern countries (speaking from a French point of view) like Denmark, so I think I'd rather live in France. But I may be completely wrong.

    When are you coming to Canada exactly? June,July, August...?

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    1. I'm arriving during the third week of July and am staying until the last week of August. I'll be spending the entire time in Ottawa.

      Actually, you'd be surprised, Denmark is a lot like Canada in some ways. I certainly felt that it was more like Canada than France. For starters, most Danes speak very good English so you feel more at ease. They watch North American sitcoms in English and are more familiar with North American culture. They don't shun North American culture like some French people might. Then the paperwork is so much easier, in fact mostly anything is easier to get done in Denmark that you start to feel it is Canada after living in France for a couple of years. And then there is the coffee culture. They drink big coffees with sugar, eat brownies, cheesecake, carrot cake and other North American desserts and their cafés look more like something you would find in Canada. I could go on and on.

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  2. Sounds exciting, at least you know what to expect from Denmark. I really understand you when it comes to career. I would be a lot more content career wise if I were living in Canada. Maybe this break from Bordeaux is what you need (un petit break des voyous de ta résidence). I'm pretty sure you'll be fine.

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    1. Actually, I am one of the few ones that can say that I could not have done what I am doing back in Canada.

      The problem is, I can't really do it in Bordeaux either. I needed to live in Paris or Brussels for my chosen career.

      Yes, I know I need to get away from Bordeaux. I love it here, but I know that 'it is not good for me' if you know what I mean.

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  3. Bon courage. Who knows you will get the same type of job in Denmark, faster than an answer from France.

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    1. No, unfortunately I can't get the same job in Denmark because it involves being fluent in the native language and I am far from fluent in Danish. The same type of job exists in Denmark, but Denmark chooses its candidates from a test while in France you are chosen based on a dossier. There's no way I could pass a test in Danish.

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  4. Doesn't it seem like nothing is happening and then everything happens at once? Good luck!

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    1. You can say that again. I've spent years hoping for something here and then just as I am about to leave there is finally a glimmer of hope.

      It's always like this, isn't it?

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  5. It always seems like everything happens at once! I've never been to Denmark, so I can't really give any opinion there. Just wish you good luck with the move! And good luck with any potential decision you may have!

    -Shannon

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    1. Thanks, I'll try not to worry about it for now. There's no point getting worked up if there's nothing to get worked up about.

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  6. I feel for you on this one - new countries are fun but sometimes it's nice to feel settled too. But you know what you are getting into with Denmark, and I'm sure you'll feel more positive about the move once the upheaval is over.

    As for the job situation ... arghh! That must be so frustrating for you. But you're right, you've just got to see what happens, get as much information as you can, and try to make the best decision from there. In my experience, these things tend to work themselves out. Good luck!

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    1. I think that I am at a point in my life where I want a base. I want to live abroad on expat assignments like the 6 months we did in Denmark, but I want to be based here in France. At least I already know Denmark somewhat, that's true. We know where to go and what to do when we arrive.

      We'll see what happens about the job situation. Maybe I'll get a negative response and all this was wishful thinking.

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  7. I've been curious ever since you commented on my blog that you'd have news soon (and now I'm even more curious about the job!) It always, always seems to happen to me that there'll be nothing and then several things will arrive at once and I have to make a tough decision. I suppose I would say to go as far as you can with the process (no point pulling out before knowing whether or not you have the job I guess) and then listen to your heart (ugh, cliché). Very best of luck and I'm looking forward to tales from Denmark!

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    1. Well, I'm curious about your job, too!

      Yes, it's always like this, isn't it? You spend so much time hoping for something and then when the time comes, that thing is a let-down or you end up doing something else.

      My heart is telling me that I must accept the position. I would hate to force my husband to come back here, but I didn't just spend 5 years here doing basically nothing only to say no to the job of my dreams.

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  8. Réponses
    1. Thanks, Sara. When you announced that you were moving from Le Petit Village all I could think of was how I would be leaving France a few months after you and how I would be announcing it here. I never imagined, though, that I might stay here because I actually managed to get the job of my dreams. What are the chances?

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  9. Wow...tough decisions. I know whichever route you take will be the right one. It is irritating you got the job just before being presented with the choice to move...I was offered a teaching interview two days before I was told my work visa would not be renewed.

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    1. Yes, tough decisions. That's all part of being an adult!

      Maybe I won't be making a decision between the two and will start to live a double life divided between the two countries.

      These things always seem to happen just as everything is falling into place. You think that everything is pretty close to perfect and then, Wham!

      You actually got a teaching interview? That's great news even though you didn't have a work visa anymore. So there is hope for you to teach once you get the work visa in order.

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